Garfer no longer social pariah shocker

I today traded in my Rover 45 for a new Mazda 6 . This is a GOOD THING. Small boys will no longer point at me and fall about in fits of giggles.
I bought the Rover in a fit of abscence of mind. Driving past the dealership I saw ' NO DEPOSIT!! 0% FINANCE!! emblazoned on the window. Sounds tasty thought I. Twenty minutes later the greasy weasel of a salesman had me well and truly by the nadgers. It looked fine and shiny in the showroom. A gleaming tribute to British craftsmanship at its finest.
After a week or so driving around in my fine new purchase, I began to have misgivings. Every other Rover 45 that I encountered on the road was piloted by a crumbly geriatric in a tweed cap.
I had joined the ranks of 40 mph junction ditherers and roundabout obstructers. The label 'coffin dodger' might as well have been tatooed across my forehead. Try asking a female out when you drive a Rover 45. 'No Chance mate'. Even George Clooney would stand no chance in the totty stakes if he drove a Rover 45.
I have tolerated three years of this abject misery. I was tied into a finance deal and there was no escape without incurring severe financial pain.
Today, I was set free. The vistas of the open highway lie before me and all seems right with the world.
You can pick up a three year old 45 for £3,000. If you can live with the ignominy go right ahead. Just make sure you purchase a tartan rug and a Thermos before committing social hari kiri.