Friday, July 14, 2006

Trackies



Some people (joggers presumably) regard track suit bottoms (jogging pants) as a garment signifying sexual allure. I’ve never quite got it.

Admittedly I don’t jog; a short stroll is enough to have me collapse in paroxysms of boredom. Even so, I suppose sports related fashion monstrosities have their place. Lounging on the sofa clutching a Special Brew can the modern male can indulge in vicarious sporting triumphs whilst simultaneously resting his slippers on a velour footstool.

The things are fine in principle: it’s just that I couldn’t bear wearing them, even in private. Ball scratching commodiousness, admirable as it may be, is no excuse for legs clad in Aladdin’s cast offs.

For some reason I have a mental image of jogging pants being sub consciously connected with jumbo sized family tubs of Kentucky fried chicken. The health aspect of a well honed torso sprinting back and forth on the running track is inextricably linked with a tub of barbeque beans and a super size coke.

Personally, I think it’s about time certain garments were restricted by law to use for their intended purpose. You don’t find people down the pub wearing radiation protection suits, or dressed up as a sewer inspector.

15 comments:

First Nations said...

...well howdy, you're back! yay!

hm. at present i am wearing track bottoms, but my balls don't itch, either. i'm drinking a pop, though, and im thinking about rapping some tequila into the mix. fried chicken sounds good.

oh hell. what was i saying?

MHN for short said...

Hey Garfer!!

Do you remember the pants that were so popular in the late 80's. Not parachute pants, but the ones that MC Hammer wore that had way too much fabric, but were fitted at the waist and the ankle???

I can't remember what they were called, but the hubby and I had a friend who wore hers all the time.

That's where this post took me. A yer and three months before we got married. BOOM! Time Warp!

Glad you are back, Sir!

Wyndham said...

I go down the pub wearing a radiation protection suit - what of it?

Canute said...

My wife wears a radiation protection suit when I get back from the pub.

Arabella said...

I find it a bit distressing when men wear them, having 'forgotten' to don underpants. The jiggly factor....

suburban wonder said...

It's the elastic waistband, and the fact that the people that wear them for "fashion" are most often the ones who need them most for health.

So glad you're back!

Oh Michelle - those pants? 'Round our way, they were called seven-day shitters. I don't know the etymology behind the colorful name, but there you go.

funny thing said...

Shorts that are really short are a crime.

We used to have a guy and his wife that would visit our house when I was a kid, and the bloke's penis would poke out the side of his shorts, it was disgusting.

Mind you, I have to tuck my boobs into my waistband when I sit down to avoid peepage...

pissoff said...

That's just down right nasty - the penis poker that is.

I hate sweats. People shouldn't be allowed to go out in public in those.

Spinsterella said...

My gym is in an ultra chav-tastic part of town.

The other day, two teenage girls changed out of their workout stuff (tracksuits) into their high fashion clothes (slightly different tracksuits).

Both looks complemented by tonnes of argos gold.

Fantastic.

MHN for short said...

seven day shitters! Too freakin' funny!!! I laughed out loud, loudly!

The penis poker...tuck that baby back in! Oh, not that way...

Rowan said...

there is no sex appeal there, trust me! dis-gust-ing!

Rowan said...

we called them hammer pants here michelle!

Rowan said...

and guidos sometimes...

Kyahgirl said...

garfer, I agree, they should be restricted to exercise.
The worst thing is what Arabella pointed out, twinned with a great big gut hanging over the waitband. ewww!

MHN for short said...

I found them online. Thet were also called "harem" pants. That's what our friend wore. :-o