Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Pimp my Quiff

Betty's Blogger voteathon on who was the most sexually alluring British trade unionist of the 1970's has had me on tenterhooks. I was gratified to see that Rodney 'The Outlaw' Bickerstaffe's magnificent rockabilly quiff and general bad boy demneanor has resulted in a strong showing for the bespectacled wunderkind. He's in with a strong chance, make no mistake.

Rodney's quiff has got me thinking about the lack of elderly Teddy Boys on the high street these days. They used to be commonplace. A middle aged bloke with a magnificent plumage, an Edwardian drape jacket, and a pair of crepe soled brothel creepers didn't raise so much as an eyebrow among the general populace.

The Teds achieved sartorial perfection in 1956 and weren't about to alter their appearance to satisfy the vagaries of fashion. They didn't take kindly to other yoof sub cultures attempting to usurp their position as the kings of cool. The Mods suffered much at their hands, and God help any poor solitary Punk (usually a sensitive only child type) caught in the open by a gang of Teds. They took no prisoners.

Should anybody be lucky enough to encounter an elderly Ted they should equate the experience with spotting a wooly mammoth lumbering through the undergrowth. Pat him on the back and tell him that "Jerry Lee Lewis is still the business me old mucker".

You'll have a friend for life.

13 comments:

S.I.D. said...

Sadly my older brother was one of these Teds, and I have a photograph of him in a pose while kicking a bicycle.

Cool or what?

Twat.

Reg Pither said...

It's like kids in those blue, National Health glasses - they used to be everywhere but Thatcher had them all killed.
I think the ageing Teds are all just too disabled now to get out and about. They're been replaced by those fat, balding, 50-something businessmen who don full leathers at the weekends and ride around on massive, expensive motorbikes, pretending that they're 20 again and still cool.

garfer said...

A living link to the world of Tedness! You should feel privileged Sid.

The advantage of 50 something businessmen buying fast bikes is that they have slow reaction times and tend to die horrific deaths beneath the wheels of 40 ft container lorries.

KAZ said...

Thanks for the advice on greeting teds Garfer.
Didn't the member for Salford lads' club have a bit of a quiff?

garfer said...

Yes, and he also expressed admiration for skinheads at one point.

Genius or twat? It's hard to tell.

Betty said...

I presume the Teds had to retire when they started to suffer from receding hairlines. A combover quiff just doesn't look right, does it?

My auntie used to say that she was a Teddy Girl (!) in her youth. Years later, she dropped a tray full of plates on the floor in shock when she saw Billy Fury while she was working at Hilton Park motorway services.

garfer said...

Eddie Cochrane was the best.

He had a genuine limp.

KAZ said...

Wasn't Gene Vincent the one with the limp?

Convict said...

My father-in-law used to drive 40ft trucks but I doubt that he killed any ageing Teds under his wheels as he was a Ted himself. He could still manage a quiff if required as he still has all his hair unlike me.

When he can convince her, he and the mother-in-law get up and dance to the old classics.

garfer said...

Quite right Kaz, I stand corrected. You obviously know more about old time rock 'n' roll than a mere whippersnapper like me.

Elderly Teds jiving in the living room must be quite a sight Convict. I just hope none of the furniture gets broken.

Arabella said...

I've been looking for a Billy Fury record for years now - it was a fave tune at a club I used to go to - 'She's So Far Out She's In' - a b side, I think.
So I can quite understand the reaction of Betty's auntie - fortunate that she dropped only the tray, considering....

garfer said...

Yes, ye olde rock 'n' roll has that effect on some people.

Birdman said...

My cousin's husband's an elderly Ted. Sadly, these days, he combs his quiff forward from where his DA should be. It looks hilarious.