Saturday, May 30, 2009

Rave on John Donne

Newfoundland.

Well congratulations, you got here first and reconnoitred the upsides and the downsides before bagging a trawl of fish and considering further horizons.

I am a frustrated imperialist: desirous of new regions of potential conquest and the prospect of a fine cockaded hat and a retinue of obsequious servants and willing stable wenches.

It's not too much to ask; a mere small domain like Sarawak, or French Polynesia with a lifetimes supply of free dancing girls and sundown cocktails would do. Unfortunately they've all been taken and I'm faced with the prospect of negotiating the rings of Saturn if I'm to have any chance of inculcating the rubric of British truth and justice in the breasts of the unruly heathen natives.

It's a tough piece of gristle to chew on, but what can I do?

I am, potentially, undone.

9 comments:

Liz said...

You don't want Sarawak. It is full of biting insects. Trust me - I speak from experience.

garfer said...

I'll stick to the Hebrides.

Mopsa said...

Hebrides full of mozzies....idyllic is relative of course, and the far side of the moon is probably where most MPs would like to be right now.

KAZ said...

You posts are always pure poetry to me Garfer!
Oh and there's a bit of spare land opposite our flats. Very handy for Wetherspoons.

The Mistress said...

I hear Uranus is uncharted territory.

The Poet Laura-eate said...

Tis tough being cursed with world dominational tendancies.

As a fellow sufferer I truly empathise. And so does my split personality.

MommyHeadache said...

Couldn't you just go mad and have a fiefdom in your front room peopled by blow up dolls and gnomes?

garfer said...

Mopsa

Fiddling MP's should be consigned to the nearest black hole.

Kaz

Proximity to a Wetherspoons is vital.

MJ

And so it shall remain.

PL

Indeed, megalomania and schizophrenia are a difficult combination of afflictions.

EmmaK

Intriguing. I think Id need some illegal immigrants to act as servants as well.

Madame DeFarge said...

Go for Motherwell. It could do with something to make it more interesting.