Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Beer.


I like lots of things: fast cars, loose women, kebabs drenched in chilli sauce, pork pies, P J Harvey. These are all great pleasures, but fade into insignificance when compared with the wonderful 6X beer produced by the Wadworths Brewery, Devises, Wiltshire.

I’m not really your real ale type. I don’t have a beard, wear dungarees, or have a beer gut. I just like good beer; lots of it. Living in Scotland I can only get 6X in bottles: an acceptable substitute, but not a patch on a hand drawn pint in a Devon pub.

As a student, 6X provided my major source of calories and vitamins. Augmented by the occasional carton of fried rice from the Happy Valley Chinese takeaway, Bath, it provided all the energy required for lying in bed until midday, and whiling away the hours until opening time.

I’ve never felt healthier before or since: I was positively blooming with vigour. All this ‘eat five veg a day’ stuff is obviously utter bollocks. The powers that be should be providing small bottles of 6X for primary school children, thus inculcating them in the delights of a healthy balanced diet.

Apparently there are tribes in the Amazon rain forest that don’t regard beer as a drink: they consider it to be a food. Clever people these Amazonians. Sting would do them a damn sight more good shipping them some 6X than wittering on about the depletion of the rainforest.

Wadworths 6X rules.

22 comments:

pissoff said...

I hate beer.

garfer said...

Thoughts of beer make sick people feel even sicker.

I drink lots of beer and am consequently never sick.

Think on.

Herge Smith said...

Beer makes me feel nice.

And then nasty the next day, and since I got in my 30's depressed the day after that.

I don't drink anywhere enough of beer.

I don't drink beer much, can't my lady friend drinks all the beer in the fridge before me.

I don't think PJ is Wadworth 6x drinker to be honest.

Maybe Snakebite and black in the early days, but not now.

Sniffy said...

Yeah, but if the amazonians got all the 6X, what would you do?

Beer is good. Good beer is good and it does make you feel nice up to about the 5th one. As far as I can remember at least.

I think PJ Harvey seems more of a brandy and babycham.

garfer said...

P J drinks a gallon of rough cider and then sings '50 Ft Queenie'.

Whadda gal.

Herge Smith said...

Not anymore Garfer... not anymore.

Kyahgirl said...

oh course its a food!!

beer is made from hops, hops are 'like' a vegetable therefore beer is a vegetable. really.

yum!

garfer said...

Logical thinking Kyahgirl, logical thinking.

I think you should start up a micro-brewery. It would beat drinking that Coors shite.

suburban wonder said...

Kyahgirl - love the way you're thinking. Kind of like, chocolate is a vegetable because it comes from beans and beans are vegetables.

I detest beer. It tastes like horse piss smells. I've been around enough stables to know.

garfer said...

This is worse than the cider conversation.

I like BEER: now fuck off and die.

pissoff said...

I used to like cider but don't even like that anymore. Horsepiss is right. Beer tastes like horse piss - I agree.

I like sushi.

suburban wonder said...

Oooh, touchy? You beer lovers should be happy when someone says they hate it - all the more for you!

Feck off yourself, sweetie.

The Blind Flaneur said...

I once heard a radio presenter called Graham Beecroft make this claim on air: 'There's only one thing more unattractive than a woman with a pint, and that's a woman with facial hair'.

Controversial, perhaps, but worthy of discussion

First Nations said...

one can pluck facial hair; one plucks my beer and i'll make one cry like a little bitch, you want ugly.
I love beer, me. Northfork Stout, Bay Brewery Amber, Skagit Valley Extra Dark and the homecrafted Christmas brew our buddy makes...a man gifted by the brewery gods, I might add.
So yeah, beer. it's good.
Cider too.

Spinsterella said...

As a woman who is often to be seen with a pint (usually lager, sorry, but sometimes Guinness) I'm am off to hunt down Graham Beecroft and beat him about the head with my handbag.

Convict said...

You and my missus could have a great chat about Devizes, she used to live a couple of miles away and her Nan's surname happens to be Usher.

6X is ok, but I prefer others like Spitfire, London Pride, Old Speckled Hen, Bishops Finger, Tanglefoot, the list goes on. I'm not just an ale drinker either; I like my lagers too especially Hurlimann and Stella.

S.I.D. said...

I can't believe you forgot the pleasure of smoking??


Pinto O' Guinness please!

MHN for short said...

Dave likes the Black and Tans. I made them for him once. I didn't parktake though. Not much of a beer person meself, but y'all are welcome to my share!!

Where's the whiskey?

Arabella said...

Sarah's Ruby Mild is an excellent Black Country beer.
A brewery/restaurant in the Haight produces its own version in tribute - not so strong (this is CA) and a bit too cold but better than a slap round the face with a packet of pork scratchings. I think.

funny thing said...

Innis and Gunn is my favourite tipple at the moment. That's a class beer, if ever you decide to try it.

Tina, don't listen to this bit:

(you can buy it at Asda)

I have facial hair too, but I mow it about once a month with a 2-stroke brush cutter and I don't think anyone is any the wiser..

Kyahgirl said...

you've hit upon a great topic! look at us discussing beer ad nauseum!

Well, I'm going to go have a rye and pepsi but I still like beer.

Rowan said...

I'll take a good rye thank you very much