Saturday, January 20, 2007

Drenched

It rains a lot in the west of Scotland. So far this year there have been two dry(ish) days, the rest dominated by howling gales and horizontal rain.

I blame the Americans for this. After all, the depressions develop in the Gulf of Mexico and hurtle across the Atlantic with a little encouragement from the Jet Stream. Chuck and Wilma are happily ensconced in their Florida villa congratulating themselves on their escape from frozen northern climes. It doesn’t occur to them to spare a thought for Scots shivering beneath their eiderdowns. Some people just lack empathy.

I’m convinced that the melancholy Celtic temperament, and propensity for consuming vast quantities of whisky/vodka/rum, is an inevitable outcome of foul winter weather. Opening the curtains to another morning of torrential downpours and gales aspiring to hurricane status is enough to get anybody down.

I suppose being confined indoors watching daytime television does have a few meagre compensations. Snack foods may be consumed on the sofa, and the hundreds of DVDs purchased on a whim from Amazon viewed at ones leisure.

I’m thinking of moving to Vladivostok. It might freeze my bollocks off, but at least it won’t rain every day; and the vodka should be cheaper.

11 comments:

pissoff said...

I don't mind rain. My destination of choice at this point in my life is the Cook ISlands. If only I didn't have kids.

garfer said...

The Maldives are much nicer.

Their dusky maidens are duskier by far, and the beers cheaper.

MHN for short said...

Yes, yes. blame the Americans, especially since we have more power than God and can control the weather with our little satelites. ;-)j/k

I saw on the news that England is being hit with category 4 or 5 hurricane winds. That's horrible and you don't even have the luxury of getting to call the storm a hurricane. That sux. Are these the torrents of which you speak? Have they gone as far north as Scotland?

Does the government give storm assistance when something like that happens or do they expect your insurance to take care of the damage?

First Nations said...

no no no no. move to WASHINGTON STATE.
you'll feel right at home and the accents will amuse you.
but the vodka is kinda expensive.

never mind.

S.I.D. said...

"I’m convinced that the melancholy Celtic temperament, and propensity for consuming vast quantities of whisky/vodka/rum, is an inevitable outcome of foul winter weather."

And you want to move?????

Your losing it Garfy.

garfer said...

To Russia?

Deffo. The Russkis are the biggest vodka quaffers on the face of the earth.

I'm off on the next banana boat.

Sniffy said...

Fucking rain and wind - hate them, especially the wind. It's so depressing. And now it's getting cold as well.

pissoff said...

Don't know if I'm in to dusky maidens, however, even I could be tempted by Halle Berry.

I think I'm more into wine nowadays - do the Russians make wine?

suburban wonder said...

Oh, you big whiner! Suck it up and buy an umbrella.

I'm considering someplace warm and tropical, like Hawaii. I'll recline on the beach and have dusky waiters bring me Mai Tais.

Convict said...

If you want somewhere warm and tropical move to Devon. There's plenty of oil and you might be able to pick something decent up off the beach; like a BMW motorbike or an exhaust or ...

Rowan said...

we had great weather until january. now we're paying for it in snow. God, I hate the winter.