Friday, October 12, 2007

Thespian Masterclass


I can't be doing with David Duchovny.

The geezer doesn't act: he just plays himself being David. "'Oh look at my lovely puppy fat!" I bet that's what he says to himself when he preens before his dressing room mirror. His technique is almost up there with Clint Eastwood in the 'he's either smiling or he isn't' stakes.

Not satisfied with the afterglow of the intense sexual chemistry (not) he displayed with Gillian Anderson in the X Files, he's now smiling and not smiling in a new series 'Californication' in which he says 'fuck' a lot.

I hope the Red Hot Chilli Peppers sue the arrogant Yankee arse for nicking one of their song titles.

16 comments:

The Mistress said...

Is that SID's beloved coffee mug over his willie?

garfer said...

Certainly not.

Sidney uses a ceramic thimble on which he has painted a diminutive shamrock.

Don't be nasty to him, he's still hungover.

Mopsa said...

I tried, truly I did, but I suspect the reason why it's on Channel 5 is just because it's so .....dire. Oh, and the tits. Don't forget them - sure C5 didn't.

garfer said...

Yes tits to the right, tits to left, and chuppy chops Duchovny in the middle saying 'fuck'.

Marvellous

KAZ said...

Is he trying to do Homo - Erotic?

btw - Tunnocks tea cakes are on p71 of 'Living etc.' this month.
Have a look in Tesco or the newsagents - don't buy it - it's crap.

garfer said...

I'll stick to Good Housekeeping and Peoples Friend thanks.

Peevish McSnark said...

Can't stand him. Don't really like Gillian Anderson, either. And, frankly, I don't think DD needs to even borrow SID's thimble to cover his microscopic willie.

S.I.D. said...

MJ and Garfy and shock horror Sub Wonder ~ Cheeky sods!

Bloody hell,now Garfys showing naked men.

The Mistress said...

SID says, "Bloody hell,now Garfys showing naked men."

*sniff*

I'm so proud of him.

garfer said...

I displayed the naked DD in order to accentuate the miniscule nature of Sids thimble.

The Mistress said...

Yet you told ME not to be nasty.

garfer said...

There's nothing nasty about telling the truth MJ.

I was brought up to speak with candour.

Anyway, his hangover has now subsided so he is fair game.

I have a nice surprise for him tomorrow.

The Mistress said...

Perhaps we should put our heads together one of these days, Garfy and create a whole series of surprises for him.

Have you seen his moobs? I have pics.

*hurry Sunday*

*rubs hands gleefully*

S.I.D. said...

*laughs*

Why wait till Sunday??

There's always Saturday's for secrets?

*runs out*

The Mistress said...

He who hesitates is lost, Garfy.

*laffs*

Barry Lawrence said...

I'll give you one bit of advice. If ever you go round to his gaff and he offers you a mug of coffee.....DECLINE!!