Saturday, September 10, 2005

Oh Lordy!

While aimlessly perusing technorati for any links to my lame blog posts, I was interested to find a link to urban dictionary
Imagine my utter astonishment when the link directed me to the following:

GARFER

Slang for a sexually transmitted disease rising in popularity in the United States. It’s most common among drug users and the poorer areas. The proper name for “the Garf”
is Bacterial Intestinal Miracitus. The disorder is known to last over a span of years and can be controlled by sulphonamide class synthetic antibiotics.
The worst fact about the Garf is that there is no known protection against its infection, not even condoms. Symptoms are subtle at first and bloom within 2 to 3 months. Initial symptoms include fatigue, sleep pattern changes, dry mouth, and muscle ache. Anyone with this disease should be checked immediately.

I don’t want to catch the Garfer, so I abstain from all forms of sexual intercourse.

Yikes! All this time I have been merrily typing away under a moniker which is used Stateside to describe a nasty sexual disease.

As a matter of interest, I thought I’d check out urban dictionary on the user names of some of my fellow bloggers. Imagine my delight in discovering:

HERGE

A Herge is a general word to describe an act of bizarre sexual behaviour between two strangers.
Also used as describing the individuals who are involved in the act of a Herge. Eg. by doing that you are a Herge.

Those people were Herges.

and (rather wonderfully):

WYNDHAM

A young supple 16 year old boy looking to pleasure anyone or anything in his way.

Wyndham likes to pleasure…..or….I got Wyndhamed today.


I strongly advise everyone to check out their user names for any unsavoury connotations. By the way, I’m free on Wednesday night if anyone fancies a shag.

13 comments:

pissoff said...

LMAO! "I'm free Wednesday night." That was hilarious. I'd like to join you but Pissoff, I don't want "The Garf."

garfer said...

This is a sign from God. I've always wanted to own my own condom factory.
"These propylactics are provided by the Garfer Corporation. Protection Guaranteed".

MHN for short said...

Protection Guaranteed. How funny.

I'll take you up on Wednesday night, but you'll have to bathe first!!

That is funny about Herge and Wyndham. They all bring specific images to mind.

Unfortunately for you, yours is the only image that is unpleasant. The image only. You are quite pleasant!!

MHN for short said...

btw: I've never heard anyone talking about getting the Garf(er). Hope that will ease your mind some... :-)

Rowan said...

1. Rowan link send redefine 2 up, 2 down

1) a man often times confused with a woman because the name is feminine, but has a massive penis and flaunts it proudly
2) a person around the hieght of 6'2" and has sex with stuffed bears (usually cubs)on a double decker bus
3) a Boy who tends to get with psycho girl friends, and smells like cherries1) our name is Rowan?I thought that was a girls name?
2) "that stuffed bear is so cute"
"I think i will have sex with it"
3) What's that smell? smells like cherries or something? Oh its just Rwan and his pyscho girlfriend
Source: ker-pop, herpeville, Apr 30, 2005

Rowan said...

So, who thinks these up??? Rowan: Never imagined it was a pervy name

suburban wonder said...

Thank Christ I have an odd name, although I never thought Garfer was all that normal and look what happened to you! Apparently, according to the Urban Dictionary, I am undefined.

Shit, I could have told them that.

PS - like MHN, I've never heard of anyone getting the Garf either.

garfer said...

Maybe someone just made it up and submitted it to urban dictionary.
I am most relieved that it is mot in general usage.

MHN for short said...

Poor Garfer. I can see it now. "I swear Mom! I didn't know that's what they called it!" j/k. Havin' a little giggle all the way down here. :-)

Herge Smith said...

"bizarre sexual behaviour between two strangers"

Oh yes, you knows it!

Wyndham said...

Crikey, have just seen this post. Tweren't anything to do with me, your honour...

You know when you've been Wyndhamed!

patroclus said...

Gosh, I really wasn't expecting to find myself in the urban dictionary, but apparently:

Patroclus

A tall, frosty, beverage!
Mmmmm! Nothing like a good patroclus after a long day!

Go get your own Patroclus, You tall-frosty-beverage stealer!


Oddly disappointed.

MHN for short said...

Patroclus~ "A long cool one". Don't be disappointed. In Houston, that's a supreme compliment whether you are a human or a cold drink on a hot day! ;-D