Friday, October 03, 2008

Imponderables for the Weekend


Why do people put prawns in fish pie? They go all rubbery and 'orrible.

Why do bankers assume they know more about people's business's than the owners do when they don't even know sweet FA about their own?

What is the point of Canada?

Why are MTV Europe proposing to honour Rick 'Ghastly' Astley? Surely it can't have anything to do with his dancing? He always looked like he was stumbling around in callipers to me.

Why do people like Bruce Springsteen? He's a calliper dancer as well, and you can't be a blue collar man of the people when you're loaded.

Why has Madonna started wearing big pants? Dead frightening.

Why am I very confused and obviously not made for these times?

14 comments:

FirstNations said...

i would like to take this opportunity to apologize on behalf of right thinking americans everywhere for Bruce Springsteen. he in no way represents our national character or interests nor has he been elected to do so by any official sanctioning bodies here in the U.S. think of bruce as representing the typical american the same way that U2 represent the typical irishman, if it helps. or take up an aluminum baseball bat and give chase; either way.

thank you.

garfer said...

If Bono represented the typical Irishman it would be high time that the emerald isle was nuked.

Come to think of it it should be nuked anyway, just because of Riverdance.

The Mistress said...

What is the point of Celine Dion?

KAZ said...

I looked up pronation (see picture).
Here it is :
pr\-onate vt and vi () to turn (the foot) sole inwards; to turn (the hand) palm downward or backward with radius and ulna crossed, opp to supinate.
pr\-on\-ation n () the act of pronating.
Don't bother to thank me.

Sniffy said...

That shoe looks really comfortable. Modern running shoes are design to have the same effect only without all the weight and bits of metal.

I hate Bruce Springsteen and Bono. Imagine a horrible parallel universe where Bono/Bruce clones inhabited the planet as taxi drivers.

Yes, Ireland should be nuked, but only if there are enough warheads left after we've done France. It serves no purpose other than to make the UK look crap, which it can do perfectly well by itself.

Madonna gets away with too much, it's best that we just ignore her these days.

garfer said...

mj

Celine is the patron saint of big nosed women.

kaz

Thank you for sharing that with me.
Sigh...

Sniffy

Bono is probably the most irritating man alive, with the possible exception of Jamie Oliver.

Sniffy said...

Thank god Jamie and Bono could never breed.

garfer said...

I'd rather not contemplate that.

A litter of liver lipped, fat tongued, stumpy legged, Oirish accented, pontificating asparagus fanciers would be enough to make even me advocate euthanasia.

Barry Lawrence said...

Euthanasia should be nuked....and Australasia and Erasure.

Anonymous said...

The point of Canada is to annoy the fuck out of Americans.

The point of Celine Dion is to remind Canadians not to get too uppity and to give the rest of us something to laugh at.

Barlinnie said...

Do not get me started on that thick tongued mockney tosser, Jamie fucking Oliver.

If I only had one bullet left in a gun, I would shoot that twat twice.

.. mind you, his roast spuds done in garlic and rosemary always go down well with my dinner guests.

No.. no.. no mercy.. double tap!

The Poet Laura-eate said...

Bruce Springsteen's sex symbol status/housewive's favourite is a mystery. Madonna's taste in clothes as unsolved as the pyramids. Why go to so much trouble to look young and then ruin it with the world's most unflattering get-up???

I quite like Canadians as they still have manners, but have never seen the point of 'abroad' otherwise really.

Re the sealife pie, luckily I am a veggie, but you don't paint an appetizing portrait.

Liz said...

Don't know what prawns you're using, but they should be raw when they go in, or they'll bounce off your teeth.

Anonymous said...

Puppy is brilliantly insightful no matter whose blog he is on! I believe the purpose of Canada is to annoy the fuck out of American. Whereas the purpose of Mexico is to provide us with cheap fuel, cheap labor, cheap vacation spots, cheap roofies, a place for the underaged to get drunk and take in a donkey show, and people to actively complain about (all those damned illegals sneaking across the border) as Canada for some reason is protected from outright animosity. I think it is because of the double-edge sword they wield. If we grumble too loudly they will give us all of their Celines and keep all of their Pamela Andersons.

Carabou B.